The melody lounge hosts mics on Monday nights. It's cool when Terrance Newman and Alex Hanna are there. I like them. The bathroom sucks. It's not the worst, but it poses a lot of problems. First, it struggles with the same issue as Karma lounge. You have to walk past the person performing to get to or from the john. It's a struggle. They do a rolling lottery where they pick 5 people at a time. You have to plan out whose set you don't want to watch for those 5 people. Then when you get over to the dark corner, it's hard to see which is the men's and which is the women's. Whatever, I feel old cause I can't see in the dark as well as I used to. There's probably someone in there. So then you wait behind the person performing (the one you already decided you DIDN'T want to see) until whoever comes out. Sometimes it's a guy- they are always using ours! Ours is disgusting enough guys! Then you get in there and you see the black toilet. Black toilets freak me out! It makes me think they are trying to hide how dirty it is because you can't tell. Don't worry, at least the lighting is low in the bathroom too. Not low enough to hide the graffiti that says Triangle B. I don't know what that means. While you're squatting over the toilet (no, I don't sit here) you might notice a weird blue trash can with a no smoking sticker on it. It will remind you that that means someone smoked in there and then remind you of every bad "if there's a sign for it, that means someone did it" joke you've heard. By this point you are probably depressed. Fear not, the soap dispenser will remind you of your high school. It's the kind where you press up onto it instead of down and never enough comes out. At least this one has gel soap unlike my high school which had the dry kind. You won't want to touch the faucet because the black toilet gives you the idea that they never clean in there. Personally, I still wash my hands. The hand dryer is so close to the door and so automatic that when you open the door it will go off if you get too close, interrupting the person who is on stage now. It's probably not the same guy who's set you didn't care about. It's probably someone you like now and now you feel like a dick. It's ok. Grab another beer. You're probably going to be here a while because of the lottery thing and you're not a lucky person. If you were, you wouldn't be peeing at the melody lounge. It's better than Liquid Zoo.
3/5 Smiling Poops